regret... this word is such a dreadful one. nobody wanna live in regrets most of the time. my biggest regret was to let her go and try to push her out of my life.
i'm now caught in between in 2 sides where i can just be her good friend or continue like a foolish person.
i dunno what to say now or do now. my feelings now are to step down from everything and just to concentrate on my work, purely my work. i think these distractions has taken a toll on my work.
what happens if i just walk away from everything? haha.. i'm just running away from it AGAIN! it's just the same thing when she was with other guys when i found out about their relationships. all the wooing, pursuing and waiting was all in vain with no definite reply from her.
to tell you guys the truth, i'm quite emotionally scarred from all these events happening to me for the past year. even the hacking of my account has taken a toll on my emotional state already. it's already the peak for me. no matter how patience or tolerant am i, i'm getting very tired from all these. i think no matter how hard i tried would never changed her heart or touched her, now or in the past.
who am i to her? just a friend that she can rely on when there's a problem arose.
i'm just a foolish person to believe that waiting for her would prevail all.
i'm just a shadow following her blindly.
i guess blindly falling in love is the worst love of all kinds.
right now, i'm thinking i'm living in my biggest regrets. prove me wrong. prove me right. don't just say it but show it to me also.
so tired, just so tired..
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